varmit killin'

I have a friend that tries to be kind, all so kind, to all creatures...spiders, snakes, rats, you name it. We were talking the other day about alternative uses for household cleaners and I reminded him that he had once killed a rat with Windex spray. He felt awful about it although I figure rats are pretty much varmits and fair game for killin'. At least, if they come in my house and I catch them, they are goners. I'm not going to trap them humanely set them outside and let the little bastards come back in another day. Oh no.
Anyway, I was telling him about my recent snake encounter and thought I'd pass it along here. Used to be, any snake that appeared on my property was slated for death row. I don't like them and don't want them around. But my friend talked me into letting a couple go on their own way so I generally let pass unharmed outside. Inside is yet another matter.
I've tried my best to be kind to snakes, as he once tried to teach me but a couple of months ago, I had to take one out.
I heard my dog, barking on my screen porch. It was dark, so I turned on the porch light and went out there. There was my fat cat on one side and the terrior on the other side of a little multicolored snake. As the snake tried to strike at dog, the cat would take a swipe at him. Then the snake would try to bite the cat. They went back and forth like this while the dog barked his fool head off. I ran and grabbed a bucket with the plan to get the snake in the bucket and get him off the porch. When I couldn't figure out how to get the snake from point A to point B, I ran out to the garage and got my big scissor looking loooooooong handled hedge clippers.
I was going to kind of push him into the bucket then the little sob snake started striking at me. Add screaming to the barking noise and you got an idea of what we sounded like out there. Anyway, I resorted to giving him the big KABONG with the clippers, then picking the little bastard up and putting him into the bucket. Then since I'd already mortally wounded him, out of kindness and compassion, I filled the bucket up with water and drown him.
It looked like a baby rattler. I let him rot in the bucket before I touched that bucket again. You know, made sure he was dead. So I told my friend, don't be ashamed of windex story. Sometimes with varmits, you got to do what you got to do.

January man of the month

I am still trying and met another Mr. Wrong. If anyone is looking for him, I know where he is and I can tell you where to find them. I think I have a wrong magnet or something.
No, this guy is a nice guy. Very ordinary on the surface, but a real southern Bubba kind of guy. He spends ALL of his spare time fishing, hunting, 4wheeling, motorcycle riding, camping, and going to Nascar races. Woohoo, what fun! Especially since he does this with his 2 cousins, I'll call them Ed and Fred, since I can't remember their names. Ed and Fred have wives, for the moment. Those wives are totally ignored. Ed and Fred spend all their non-working time out playing with Bubba-B. When they are not out running around together, they are on the phone texting or talking to each other. These are guys in their late 40s. Is this normal? My ex used to like to hang with the boys all the time. It's like I told my ex, you ignore us long enough and we will learn to live without you and like it. Bye Bubba-B, it's been real.

leftovers

Sometimes I'm just too nice. No, not here in blogland. Here, I'm out for blood and vengeance. (Good thing I have a place to let it vent out, huh?) I'm talking nice in real life.
Both men of the last couple of months tried to come back around and I was nice to them. For a minute anyway. The other week Ringo, aka urostomy DIY, tried to squirm his way back into my graces. I'm telling you, he just about begged to come over and I said very politely, I don't think that would be a good idea. Now just yesterday, I received a I'm sorry I've behaved so badly email from tha Shithead. I just said, Apology accepted. Wonder what's next?
I did go on a couple of dates lately. Let's see...one lied about his height. I was taller than him. He also limits his dining adventures to Applebees type places. He wants to make sure he can have 2 or 3 or 4 beers with his dinner. He also eats out every night. Me thinks somebody could possibly have a drinking problem...rule him out for being short and a boozer. The good news here? This guy really likes me and keeps calling. Somebody stop him! Another I met recently. This guy is wealthy, taller than me, also very much rounder and heavier than me (yeah, a little chubbs). Also, I think he aged 10 years from his posted online picture. This guy is the king of eccentric. You say eccentric when they are wealthy, just FN nuts when they are poor. He gave up his car years back for ecco causes. Yep, he only drives his scooter. Nope, not a motorcycle type scooter. We are talking putt putt moped 45mph tops scooter. In addition, the guy is a regular AA attendee (two meetings a day) and just quit smoking in the past year after receiving the news he was end stage COPD. Lovely. Another date in need of a critical care nurse. I think part of his eccentricity is from lack of oxygenation to the brain. You just never know until you meet someone. People hide all kinds of things but most of them come up when you meet them. What's that saying? Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

while I'm here.........

I was reading on Scapel or Sword's blog article, Admittophiliacs about reasons people give to be admitted and it brought this to mind. I call it the While I'm here, fix everything wrong with me that's been wrong since the day I was born syndrome.

I hear it during the initial history and assessments primarily. The patient is here for COPD exacerbation and becomes insistent (during bipap face breaks)... while I'm here, I need somebody to look at my shoulder. What's wrong with your shoulder? It hurts so bad, I can't hardly use my arm. I ask, How long has it been hurting you......oh a couple of years. My doctor said it was arthritis, but I don't think it is. It hurts so bad. Also, I've had this rash on my leg.....

Most of the time it's the family insisting we get a specialist in and do something NOW about Grandpa's gnarly toenails, funky atheletes foot problem (he's CHF & looks like a puffer fish), or brother's rotten teeth (while we are busy trying to keep brother from going into full blown DTs). Many times I get these requests in the middle of the night and when I enquire as to when the problem began, it goes waaaaaaaay back. But it's an emergency right now and we want something done right now about it. Ok sure, I'll pass that information on to your doctor ......tomorrow. I'm sure he will get right on it.

Mr. November

Well, guy of the month, Mr. November, has been up for contenders. I've been out a few times and eliminated a couple of them right off. But I have met a nice guy and we've been out a few times. And yeah, he's still around, seems normal, we have fun, I'm attracted, and likes me...go figure.
I've learned that most everyone seems normal at first. I suppose that is because I apply my norms. We all have some quirks. I cuss too much and drive like a bat out of hell. I'm sure there's more but, that's all I'm fessing up to right now.
Oh man, guess online dating has really made me a bit cynical. This post may put the pox on the whole damn thing but I can't sleep so I'm writing it anyway.
Had a former contender, Liarliar (LL) trying to pop back into the picture again. I'm trying a new strategy with him. I told him about a free web site for dating. I've let this guy come in and out of my life for a couple of years, and LL breaks my heart every damn time. Maybe he will leave me be this time. In the past I have little or no resistant powers against LL. Kind of like Cary and Mr. Big on Sex and the City. Don't know why, the jerk just rings my bell. And I hate it. How can I be so FN rational about everything in my life except men, especially this one? sigh

war to slackers, an unemployed Drs rant

Interesting drama played out in the news.
A pediatrician went all out nuts after the election and wrote an unprofessional, totally irrational memo to her staff, declaring war to all slackers that elected the evil incarnate. It was sent to the media and you better believe the shit hit the fan. She has now resigned. Karma or PMS at work here? check it out here
Oh, just in case you wonder. I voted for the old guy and hunting/hockeymom with the Russian foreign policy experience (cause they fly over Alaska). But I had very mixed feeling about the vote; I could have gone either way.

late night calls

There are a few doctors at my hospital that are well known to be quite put off by calls during the night. No matter what you call them about, even when hospital policy dictates YOU HAVE TO CALL THE DOCTOR, they are total assholes about it. They do it on purpose...thinking they will receive fewer calls that way. I make very few calls after midnight. If I can stretch out that pain medication until 6am or placate the patient for a few more hours, I will not make those late night calls. However, I work critical care so if you are the cardiologist on call and my patient was just admitted and his heart is doing some funky stuff, I'm going to have to wake your cranky ass up. Get over it.