Something for everyone but the faint at heart. Critical care nursing vent-a-blog, on line dating after 40, animal adventures, cooking and gardening tips. Warning: May be offensive, crude and politically incorrect. Stories in the blog may be based on fact and may also be wildly exaggerated, at my will and imaginative discretion. The character names are changed to protect the innocent and not-so-innocent and to keep my ass from getting sued.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

failure to communicate

I'm not sure what to do. I've been dating this guy for a couple of months. I met him through an online dating site. We talked on and off for over 2 months before we ever met. He's quiet, stable, has a good job, hyper dog like mine, and comes from similar background. We've been going out once a week now, every week since we met. We both work nights and are off most of the same nights, but not quite. He lives about 1/2 hr from me and knows my area really well as he used to live right down the road from my house.
So whats the problem? I'm not sure how he feels about me. He is not one to call or text a bunch. He's just not that talkative. He's told me many times that he's just not good at calling and texting and for me to call or text him. He's not a planner, he does stuff spur of the moment. I am a planner and this bothers me when our weekend plans are made either the night before or that day. Like me he does most of his sleeping during the day, but I think when he is off, he sleeps more than I do. I only let myself sleep a few hours and then do the zombie act for the rest of the day, in the hopes I will sleep that night. I call it converting over to dayshift and I do it a couple of times a week.

When he's over, he is very attentive. I get good backrubs, smooches and hugs. He's a little slow advancing any further. (I haven't made up my mind if I should take the lead that too slutty.) Anyway, last weekend he was going to come over on Saturday and join me and my daughter for dinner. This was after I saw him on Friday. I got a text from him saying his chewed off a valve in the bathroom and he had to fix the leak first. Then later I got another text saying he had to go to Home Depot. Then nothing. Finally, I sent him a text asking what was going on. No answer for awhile so determined for an answer I called. Oh, couldn't fix the pipe, special fitting, need special tool. Guess can't come after all. Hmmmmm.

I stewed on this awhile and sent him an email later, always being braver and more likely to stick my foot in my mouth with written words. I told him that it hurt my feelings that I had to call him to find out he wasn't coming over. I told him that usually when you don't hear from guys its because they don't want to talk to you...they are not interested. I said, I like you and enjoy being with you but I'm not not sure how you feel. I can't read your mind, I need some communication. You're not communicating is sending me a message, too. A bad one. Do you want me to leave you be? He called but I was in bad state and didn't want to answer the phone (one of those fuckin hormone crying episodes that I really didn't want him privy to). So I let it ring. He answered my email and said he thought about me all night and really wanted to see me but he just wasn't feeling good, couldn't get moving, and time got away from him. He said he thought he sent a text but it was saved in drafts and didn't go out. He always said to please be patient with him. ARGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHH I know I need to be patient. I HATE being patient. I also don't want to blow it with him. I don't think I'm being unreasonable but I just don't know.